Nobody Likes Retsina

In 1930’s Chicago ,Ari and Vasili are Greek brothers who bootleg Retsina, a wine which one requires a certain taste in order to drink. With Thia and Georgia, they complain that Nobody Likes Retsina. Discovering that his brother is about to arrange a marriage for Georgia, Ari boasts that he will do better in She Gonna Marry Greek. Edna comes home from work, Ari reveals his plan and they argue over This Marriage Thing. Meanwhile Vasi takes a few dollars from “The Birds Nest,” a little bankroll that Ari keeps in the flat, he goes to the church to ask The Pa-Pa to arrange for his daughter’s marriage. The Pa-pa insists that The Price of An Angel is high and he robs Vasi blind. The Athenian Ladies Temperance Union invades the brother’s basement with their tracts and urge the men to Run Back Home, Brother. When Kourinakis suddenly shows up, Thia distracts him with kourembethes to which he answers “Nostimo.” The retsina operation is safe for now!

Later in a candy factory, Chester promises Edna, “You Will Never See Gray Skies.”

Meanwhile, Ari arranges a marriage for his daughter and a Greek doctor, And Now We Shake, but before he can tell her about it, the stage is set for Georgia and Gus’engagement party. Nervously, Vasi fumbles with his tie in Tie The Knot, then joins the Aravoneis! at the end of act one. During the party, Gus meets Georgia for the first time,Ari announces his intentions for Edna, and announces and even grander aravoneis tomorrow night at a local ballroom (the Paradise). Edna is determined to marryChester, but at least promises to show up at the party.

The second act begins with everyone plotting how to handle the evening, Trust Me. Oblivious to the plotting around him, Ari enjoys a dance with Kiddia Dinnyopoulos, The Silver Fox. Thia chaperones Georgia and Gus, who have taken a liking to one another as the women sing Welcome To The Family. When Pericles arrives, Ari tries to make the engagement happen — She Should Have Married Chester — but the Greek doctor walks out with all the family money. Because the family is completely broke, Gus feels he must break his engagement and asks Vasi to Tell Georgia Good-bye. And just when things seem the bleakest, the Feds nab Ari for selling Retsina and he is arrested on the spot.

Kouranakis insists they Hide the Retsina, and as the family one-by-one turn away from Ari, he realizes how badly he has damaged each one of his loved ones. Edna’s beloved Chester, whom Ari detests because he’s not Greek, saves the day, saves the family, and saves Ari. At last, Ari agrees to allow Edna to marry Chester, the family is re-united, and they recognize that when all else fails, there is Always Love.

Cast:

• Ari Fitikakis, brother to Vasi
• Vasi Fitikakis, brother to Ari
• Thia Fitikakis, sister to Ari and Vasi
• Georgia, Vasi’s daughter
• Edna, Ari’s daughter
• Pa-Pa, the local Greek priest
• Gus, arranged fiancé to Georgia
• O’Malley, local police
• Kiddia Dinnyopoulos, temperance advocate
• Katty, temperance advocate
• Kourinakis, local underground boss
• Chester, candymaker, boyfriend of Edna
• Dr. Pericles, arranged fiancé to Edna
• Judge, local law